Gossip Girl – Dan de Fleurette

“Welcome to the real world,” Gossip Girl.  To quote Monica Geller, “it sucks! You’re going to love it.”

This week will go down in GG history as the point when Blair, Serena (and Lizzie McGuire) finally grew up.  Reality hit the Upper East Side, and it wasn’t always pretty, in what was frankly a blimming fantatsic episode. 

Like Obama, everyone this week had to put away childish things

Americas next best friends?

America's next best friends?

Lets start with Serena.  Lily VdW finally returned, with only a teeny hint of her baby bump.  Within milliseconds she and Serena were having a disagreement, culminating in our favourite airhead vowing that instead of college, she was going to get one of those, wait what do you call them again, jobs.  Or, at the very least, an internship.  The fact that such things are fairly hard to come by in a recession seemed to escape her notice. 

After a brief angsty job hunt -“‘they all want me to come to their parties, but none of them want me to actually work for them” – Serena lucked out.  In the same way Obama got the Nobel nod for simply existing, she stumbled across a job in publicity.  Her credentials were apparently her knowledge of New York’s paparazzi escape routes, and with a blink of an eye she was minding a movie star, gamely played to maximum ham by Tyra Banks.  Of course, Serena being such a naive dumbo, she couldn’t even successfully lie to a second-rate actress, and was unceremoniously fired by her meglomaniacal boss.  Wow, jobs really are hard work.  

To continue with the tenuous Obama links (becoming a theme in this recap), Blair was positioned this week as the presidential loser, who, having failed to succeed on a national platform (NYU) returned to local politics (Constance).  To refresh your memories; last season she bestowed upon Little J the title of Queen, but upsetting Blair’s machinations was the fact that the panda-eyed one was having none of this aristocracy lark.  Armed with sleepovers and monogrammed headbands, she sought to restore the feudal system, but Chuck (who is in danger of becoming a truly sympathetic character) intervened and gently reminded her that it was time to move on.  Basically, ‘yes she can’ triumph at NYU

If Blair and Serena were forced to grow up, at least Dan was still his usual innocent self, failing to recognize he was dating an A list celeb (an unconvincing Hilary Duff).  Meanwhile Nate, who apparently got into Columbia on his own merit, still needed tutoring and Vanessa was whining about something (I forget what, she’s so annoying).  Eric made a long-overdue appearance, though the Georgina showdown failed to surface.  Lastly, when it came to taking Blair down, there was some excellent war planning on the part of Jenny and Chuck. 

If only they were on Obama’s Afghanistan advisory team.

 

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